To the freshman girls :)

To the freshman girls at JBU: Don't be afraid to hold out for the right guy. I know its exciting to be here with all these boys who pay attention to you, but don't get in a relationship just for the sake of a relationship. Just becuse they like you doesn't mean they deserve you. And it doesn't mean they are good for you. Just be patient...the right guy will come. And until then, why waste your time and emotions on anybody else?

Just a thought. :)

Does anybody read what I write here?

Fall Break

It is fall break right now and it is so wonderful. Classes start again on wednesday and these two extra days on the weekend are exactly what I need. Today I slept in until 11. Beautiful. Thats the most sleep I've gotten since school started I think. It was amazing.

Anyways, right now I am in the middle of nowhere in Texas. Its a small town called Mabank, about an hour oustide of Dallas. I love it. Livie's house is super cute and everything is just so peaceful. Michelle and I got here yesterday around 5 and there were a bunch of people here. Her friends and friends of the family. At one point we were upstairs because Livie and her best friend Claire were singing a song they had rewritten. I was watching them and it was so much fun, but it made me homesick.

It was obvious that there was so much history between the two of them. They have known each other for so long and just know each other so well. They were completely comfortable with each other and looked like they belonged doing what they were doing. I saw that and realized how much I wanted to be doing the same kind of thing with my best friends. I want to do something and have all our inside jokes and quirks come out. I want my college friends to see that. I want them to meet the people who have so greatly influenced who I am.

I'm trying to convince some of them to come to Peru with me next summer. Haha. But first we need really really good tickets. I'm looking though. I've realized this weekend that I really just want to be able to go home for a little bit. I want to be in my house and just know where everything is and how everything works. And I want the people that I've grown close to here to be able to see it.

In the meantime, however, I love JBU. I know that I am where I am supposed to be and I am content here. It is a wonderful school with so many wonderful people. God is good to me. I can't doubt that.

Well, I'm not really sure the ultimate purpose of this blog...just letting you guys know whats going on I geuss. :) I love you all very much.

Its time.

I think I'm finally beginning to truly settle in here. Thank you Jesus.

I'm having doubts that I will be able to survive college. Why has this been so hard for me?

I was encouraged

Today, my heart was encouraged. Here is a brief list describing why:

1) I woke up to rain clouds. I'm from the jungle. I love rain.

2) I got to eat lunch with this amazing girl named Allie. She is one of the sweetest girls I have ever met and she gives great hugs. She is also from Colorado Springs :)

3) I checked my mail box and found a REAL letter in it. It was from a couple that I have spent a limited amount of time with, yet they sent me a card. It even had some cash in it. I don't know why they sent it...but they were a blessing in doing so.

4) North had a worship night. If you know me, you know I love worship. My heart needed this. And God is so good. He deserves our worship. AND, He is so good that He has made it so that when we worship him, we ourselves are refreshed. He is so good.

5) I'm drinking mint tea.

Disclaimer

The new blog on my profile, called "Lynea's Mind", is for a class. I repeat, it is for a class. I do not simply sit pondering these things on my own accord. I do have a life outside of my mind, I promise. :)

Public Transportation

I miss public transportation. And I miss my big city. I feel trapped here without a car or license. I just want to get out of Siloam Springs for a few hours but its so hard in this country.

An observation

Friends are more fun before they get a boyfriend/girlfriend.

Am I losing myself?

I feel like I'm losing myself. Yes, that sounds dramatic and in all honesty I don't know if it really is dramatic or not. Let me explain a little bit further.

In Peru, I was involved in many things: praise band, student council, BLOOM, youth group leadership, teacher's aid, etc. I loved doing so much. I loved the contact that it gave me with other people. I loved walking down the hallways at school saying hi to people, or being the recipient of a hug from the middle school girls. I was never timid or shy when it came to introducing myself to people and welcoming the new kid.

Now I am the new kid, along with several hundred other freshmen. I am new to this school, and this school is new to me. I am completely out of my comfort zone, and it is throwing me off. No longer do I find it easy to start a conversation with somebody I don't know. I want to introduce myself to people and get to know them, but its like I'm always waiting for them to make the first move and they don't. What has happened to the real Lynea? The one who loved talking to everybody at youth group...is she gone? I don't think so...but how long will it take for her to emerge again? I miss her.

50 Ways God has Blessed Me

I'm challenging myself to write down 50 ways God has blessed me. Feel free to read all of them. Feel free not to. I'm going to put the most specific ones first and move to more general ones towards the end.

50 Ways that God has Blessed Me:

1. I was able to go up to San Francisco on Saturday with my brothers and two of my cousins. We had an awesome day and God is even so good to simply provide that we had enough money to park.

2. I truly have the best family ever. We have epic fun together. My grandpa is wonderful. My aunts and uncles are hilarious. My cousins are so much fun. My parents are amazing. My brothers are great (most of the time ;).

3. I graduated high school successfully and could not have possibly asked for a better school to graduate from.

4. I graduated with the best class I ever could have asked for and would not have traded any of the people in it out.

5. I am at my grandma and grandpa keagy's house right now and I love being here. I love them! I love being with them. :)

6. I got to go to Colorado in July and spend a week with a wonderful friend!

7. While in Colorado I got to have an AMAZING night out with Jessica Hanyok. It was SO great to see her.

8. I got to go camping at the lake with my Aunt Donna and brothers. We had a lot of fun!

9. I got to take a short ride with my Uncle Kevin on his street bike! Totally different feeling than a dirt bike! So much fun. :)

10. While in Colorado a lady from my church took me shopping and bought me lots of new clothes! It was a lot of fun and the clothes have been such a blessing.

11. While in Colorado the family who I was staying with also took me shopping and bought me a dorm set and then even offered to UPS it to me in California since I couldn't fit it in a suitcase.

12. Many generous people sent me cards and checks for graduation. That money will be such a blessing, especially as I am buying college books!

13. My college is giving me good financial aid for college this year!

14. I recently received word that I also received a $3000 dollar scholarship from the Thomasson Foundation for this year of college! Almost all of my scholarships are renewable. God is good.

15. I have "met" my roommate Michelle Caneday on facebook and we have talked. I think we will get along well and I think we will be good friends.

16. I was accepted into the Honors Program at JBU. I think I will have been awesome opportunities because I am part of that. I also have the option to do free laundry at the honors house. ;)

17. I was able to meet my new Keagy cousin, Isaac. He stole my heart right away. :) He is a little cutie and I'm so excited to be able to watch him grow up...even if I only get to see him once or twice year.

18. I have the best friends that anybody could ever ask for. I do miss them incredibly but God is faithful and He will not leave me alone.

19. My grandpa Thiesen is getting remarried in September to Aunt Grace Fuqua, a lady who used to live in Peru also. In fact, the Fuqua and the Thiesens were good family friends and spent several new years eves together many years ago!

20. God has amazing things for me ahead! I'm super excited about it!

21. I got to go across the Golden Gate Bridge! I've always wanted to! It was great. :)

22. While in San Fran I was able to stand in the Pacific Ocean. I usually refer to it is "My ocean." I was so happy to see my ocean. I have missed it.

23. My aunt and uncle gave me an amazing phone and put me on their plan that includes unlimited texting! It has been such a huge blessing.

24. I was able to spend last wednesday with Janel Martin, my 6th grade science teacher from Peru! I always love seeing her.

25. I got to see Joshua David Bonner before leaving Peru! It was SO good to see him again. When are you going to come see me at JBU?

26. I have been able to talk to Dominica Ayala frequently since I left Peru via her vonage phone. I love technology. I need those times of talking to her. I would love to talk to you too!

27. I was able to have a long phone conversation with Julia Block. I needed that.

28. I have been able to text frequently with Alisha Austin and Amy Lucas!

29. I have contact via text with several other friends throughout the country. Did I say I love technology?

30. This might sound vain but I assure you its not meant to. It truly is a blessing to me. I love my hair....God blessed me with hair that I really like.

31. While in Colorado I was able to see my old english teacher from 9th grade at James Irwin. I had such a wonderful time seeing her and getting to know her better!

32. I made some new friends in Colorado Springs at my church! That was fun. :)

33. I can truly call my teachers from ICSL my friends. I think thats a pretty huge blessing.

34. I went to a wonderful church in Peru that I'm really going to miss. The pastor was wonderful and Pamela became a wonderful friend.

35. God has confirmed several things in my life through different people recently. He is so good!

36. God has given me a passion for youth! It is so good to have a direction that I know I want to go in life!

37. My nasty wound on my arm seems to finally be getting better. That is a greater blessing than I think anybody realizes.

38. I have not had a headache today. Last night was miserable. Today has been such a blessing to be headache free! :D

39. God has given me many people to love. God has given me many people who love me.

40. I will have my brother at college with me for two years!

41. God is not finished with me yet. He is nowhere near done.

42. I always have the food I need to live. And even if I didn't for a few days, I would be ok...I have eaten enough recently to keep me going for a while!

43.I was privileged to grow up in a third world country! And it is a beautiful third world country!

44. I have a larger world view than many people simply because God decided that I would live outside of the United States.

45. I have a heart for the homeless people here in America. I truly believe that is a blessing. I would love to go buy all of them meals and sit and eat with them and talk to them. Anybody up for going with me sometime to homeless scout?? Haha :)

46. I believe God will provide for me to go home and see friends soonish. I will be praying with all my heart that I can be there to see Dominica Ayala graduate in a year.

47. I had the best senior trip I could have ever asked for! So many amazing memories were made and it will be something that I will always remember with joy!

48. He has blessed me simply by BEING THERE. By EXISTING.

49. He has blessed me by LOVING me.

50. He has blessed me in the WAY THAT HE BLESSES ME. I know it may seem redundent. But think about it...its so true. He wants to bless us. That in and of itself is a huge blessing.

College Math

A couple of things about college math:

1. Getting ready for college = Necessity for lots of money + Lots of generous people + Lots of thank you notes.

2. I am going to take the lowest level of math that I am required to take in college. I am not a fan of math. In fact, I am probably an anti-math extremist, if such a thing exists.

How do I respond?

The first thing that somebody said to me when I first got to the United States last Thursday was "What were you doing in Peru?" I responded, "I lived there." The customs agent then asked, "Oh, so you live in Peru?" At that point, I wasn't sure what to say. I painfully replied, "Well, I did until last night." After that, when he was finished with my passport and customs form he said, "Welcome back home!" I simply said thank you and walked into the United States without correcting him.

Since then, upon meeting people, I have been asked "So you live in Peru?" What do I say? I want to say, "Yes! I do and its amazing!" But instead I just say, "Well actually I just graduated so I won't be living there anymore." Its amazing how difficult it is to make myself respond like that.

People have also asked me, "So how was Peru?" as if I was simply on a short missions trip there or something. How do I respond to that? I lived there for 17 years! It was good, it was bad, it was exciting, it was painful. It was life. Literally. So...how do I sum that up into the 10 second answer people want?

I just don't know how to respond to people right now? I'm stuck in between two worlds and I don't have good answers for anybody. I guess my pathetic little responses will have to do for now.